If you don’t love (like) yourself
how can somebody else like or even love you?
Maybe you struggle with low
self-esteem or lack confidence, or not feel attractive or have had bad
experiences dating as your reasons or excuses for remaining single. Or having
had a bad relationship or marriage or difficult divorce or been cheated upon.
Your radar needs to be clear if
you are to attract what you want. What we think is what we become, so connect to
your deep desire and not your fear. It is about learning to like yourself and
appreciate yourself and become your own best friend and not about blaming or complaining.
You aren’t going to meet someone
if you stay in every weekend, so find places to go or try different things to do.
Do some small thing every day to move you towards your goal of meeting somone.
If on-line dating, take time to
write your own profile and certainly not get someone else to do that for you.
Be clear about what it is you are looking for. Be honest in your profile and
use an up to date photograph and if you join, then be proactive and respond to
those viewing your profile.
In your pursuit to find the right
person you will hopefully find what you are looking for, or make a good friend
along the way or learn new hobbies and interests and live a more fulfilling
life.
Other people’s opinions that all
the best men or women are already taken, or you find it difficult to trust
again, fear of commitment or you are afraid of getting hurt are all reasons
people remain single. Or excuses that I am too old, or too fat or unattractive,
keep us stuck in that mind set too. We cannot attract what we desire, if we
despise it, whether it is disliking the opposite sex or hating yourself.
Sometimes people can appear too
eager to meet someone and it comes across as being desperate so don’t rush. Again
be clear what you want. Start by learning to like yourself and take time to
build a good relationship with yourself. Do things which you enjoy and nurture
you. Fill your life with hobbies, interests and people that make you feel good
and take you out of yourself, and who knows what the future will bring.
Margaret Cook M.Ed Dip Hypn MBACP
About the author: Margaret is a qualified counsellor and hypnotherapist and has been in private practice for 21 years
About the author: Margaret is a qualified counsellor and hypnotherapist and has been in private practice for 21 years